Very few readings could have hurt my brain more.

[saffronhare]

From Free Will Astrology:



"I propose that you conduct a radical experiment for the next three weeks. Between now and July 22, try on the theory that life is on your side. Assume that all of creation is conspiring to give you exactly what you need, exactly when you need it. At least once every day, speak these words with passionate sincerity: "I believe that reality is a sublime comedy staged for my education and amusement, and that there is a benevolent conspiracy to liberate me from my ignorance and help transform me into the unique masterpiece I was born to be."

::blink::

Comments

I agree with your baffled

[capriciouslass.livejournal.com]

and I'll add a "huh?"

Picses:
My Piscean friend Risa dreamed that the Buddhist monk and teacher Thich Nhat Hanh wanted to give up his celibacy to pursue a romantic relationship with her. She was flattered -- the man is a brilliant saint who has written more than 20 books -- but she ultimately decided to stick with her husband. The night after she told me this dream, I dreamed that my three best Piscean friends were making love with Mother Teresa, Buddha, and the 16th-century Kabbalist holy man, Isaac Luria. From this evidence, as well as certain astrological data, I conclude that you Fish are in the midst of trying to integrate your spiritual and sensual yearnings. To expedite this exciting process, I suggest you murmur exuberant prayers during your sexual encounters this week.

But thanks for reminding me to check that one. I forgot in the rush of oversleeping this morning.

Re: I agree with your baffled

[agrnmn.livejournal.com]

I for one am ready to do a lot of praying this week!

praying this week

[capriciouslass.livejournal.com]

Yes, but since I don't currently have anyone to pray with, that horoscope didn't seem to fit me well.

Enjoy your prayers this week though!

Duty calls

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

As it turns out, I'm under oath to serve as priestess to all uninitiated pagans... I would be delighted to spend some time praying with you.
Ah, the things we do for piety.

Re: Duty calls

[capriciouslass.livejournal.com]

hmmm... not sure if that comment was directed at agrnmn or at me, but I'll jump back into the fray.
Sure, let's pray.

Re: Duty calls

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Hey, it's all about service. :)

I see your "huh?"...

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

...and raise you a "WTF?!?"

"Gypsy Rose Lee (1914-1970) was not a stripper in the sense we think of it today. Her more precise title was striptease artist. During her performances, she never actually took off all of her clothes. Her style was rooted in the advice her mother gave her: "Make them beg for more -- and then don't give it to them." While I don't suggest you apply for a gig at a strip club this week, Sagittarius, I do recommend that you incorporate some of Lee's approach in your own chosen field."

Somehow, I don't think more teasing is really the solution here...

more teasing

[saffronhare.livejournal.com]

Well, it can hardly be bad, can it? Wait. Forget I asked that.

I propose that we link up my "universe, revealing beauty and generally great shit" with your striptease...plus some ecstatic prayer. There. That's better.

Gemini Scores!

[fionnabhar.livejournal.com]

From Free Will Astrology: "Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once. Wouldn't you agree? And that's one reason I'm authorizing you to repeat a naughty or excessively rowdy adventure from the past, Gemini. Here's another reason: The same series of actions that had an awkward result way back when will lead to a breakthrough this time. That's what I predict, anyway -- especially if you add a little tenderness to your mischief this time around."

Guess I'll have to lose my virginity again.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

What, they've got featherynscale writing their horoscopes now?